I can't make me love you.

I predicted correctly that Ben left today, and soon Aurore will be gone. It's been a drag of a day, even though I got up at 10, after breakfast dad called and said I should speak with mum before she left to go see S getting her hair and makeup trial done this morning - so I was rushed into the obligatory wishing of Mother's Day call. That only lasted no more than 2 minutes and then I was lost for most of the morning. I ended up not doing much, just looking up a dozen articles for CRM coursework and mindless stuff in between. I really hope tomorrow he will say that we can use studies from different countries 'cause there's hardly many from our own. Anyways, after lunch I started to pick up pace with getting more articles and typing the first sentence of my coursework when I decided it was time to dust and hoover and it was all done really successfully. Other than that, I did a few more sentences for the coursework and tried getting onto the revision side of things with little luck. Ended up just having a quick glance at SPSS outputs for ANOVA's to try and understand them, but I'm pissed off with myself for not getting the regression stuffs done.

Tomorrow is the last workshop and i'm still debating whether to go in or not. It's basically going to be maybe half an hour with the logistics stuff and then if I'm lucky she'll just tell me where to look for the ANOVA output, i'm worried that 'cause I haven't prepared the regression stuff that i'll still have questions unanswered :/ But, maybe i'll just turn up late? Mum's been preoccupied all day, got 2 minute conversations with her, and as predicted she started filling Aurore's survey but hasn't finished. Hopefully it'll get done before A leaves. But yeah, just been remembering him and feeling lonely and wishful. I really did try and phone my grandma but I just couldn't. Sometimes i'm really incapable.

So yeah, perfect time to watch GG and basically, like woah. I cannot believe Dan ruined Blair's life by sending in the vid to Gossip Girl, and so Georgina has taken over from GG because she's on the hideout since the car accident thing. And woah on Chuck and Blair's little talk "it has to be on equal terms," jfbsjkdghs. Oh yeah, and I hate Louis and his mother; and I bet someone's going to end up paying the dowry. Blair did a really mature, sensible and selfless thing though; going with Louis and keep up the charade despite everything. Moral of the storyline; choose happiness.

I just wish I could find happiness.